Tales to Astonish

Christylee is still on her self-imposed hiatus from Livejournal, while she devours Harry Potter (it's pretty slow going, though; she's about halfway through), so I'm reporting on the trip, over here.

I've been to a half-dozen or so of these events, but this was her first Dragon*Con. Indeed, her first fantasy/comic book convention of any kind, if you don't count ren fests. And I think we can say she was pretty much blown away.

We arrived about 10, Saturday morning, right on schedule, and took the last space in the Hilton's parking deck. We had to travel through two more convention hotels before we found the line for the folks who had pre-registered. Trust me on this one: if you ever plan to attend one of these major regional conventions, PRE-REGISTER. If you don't pre-register, you might as well not bother attending, because you'll spend most of your first day, standing in line.

After getting our badges and schedules, Christylee was about to pass out from hunger, so we stopped in at a mall food court across the street for lunch, and to plan our agenda. She wanted to check out a writing seminar (you just knew that was coming), which started at 2:30 and ended at 3:30. We figured that would give us plenty of time to zip over to the James Marsters Q&A session, which started at 4.

Well, guess again. We found the ballroom where Marsters was appearing at about 3:45. And we found the beginning of the line. And we walked the breadth of the courtyard, outside the building, down the stairs, onto the sidewalk, down the block, around the corner, down the next block, and that's when we gave up. We never saw the end of the line.

So we walked back to our hotel, and tried to check in, but where told by Heinrich, or Gustav, or someone with a brisk German accent, that zere was a little bit of a delay, and our ruhm would be ready in a couple of hours. Even though it was already an hour past check-in, we took it in stride and decided to cruise the dealer room.

The dealer room was a big disappointment. First of all, it was so crowded, you literally couldn't move, at times. And secondly, there just weren't that many dealers (less than a hundred, which is pretty paltry, for a convention that boasts upwards of 50,000 attendees). The best part of the dealer room is that the crowded conditions mean you get a chance to see the girls in the Wonder Woman and Vampirella and White Queen costumes, up close and personal. But don't tell Christylee that.

Aw, who am I kidding? She was spending just as much time, ogling the guys in kilts.

That night, we got roped into an hour-long session with some star of Buffy I had never heard of (which should have set off some red flags). Christlee went ahead to scout out just who this guy was, and someone told her, "Oh, he's great! He tells a lot of funny stories, and he knows everyone, and it's real informative, and fun! He played the chaos demon in Buffy!"

For those who don't know, the chaos demon was a joke appearance. He has about 3 seconds of screen time, and I told Christylee I wasn't going to that session. She said she was going, so about 5 minutes later, we were walking into the session. This guy spent about 3 minutes talking about the whedonverse, and then spent the other 75 minutes (yes, he actually ran over) talking about some short films he had made. Turns out he's a local boy, who shows up at the convention every year, banking on his fame as the chaos demon, and parlaying that into publicity for his personal project. And THEN, all these other people in the audience (of about 15--I guess everyone else had gotten suckered in, in previous years, and knew better than to attend) started sucking up to him and asking him questions about how to direct a movie, and how much they enjoyed his performance of the Little Engine that Could, in the Atlanta Children's Theatre production, and yadda yadda yadda, blah blah blah.

But don't get me started. That's another topic.

Sunday, we learned our lesson and got in line for Marsters session about an hour and a half before it was scheduled to start. We STILL had to walk through the courtyard, outside, down the stairs, onto the sidewalk, down the block, and around the corner, but finally we found the end of the line. We got pretty good seats, in the center, about eight rows back. I couldn't see at all, thanks to Hagrid, who was sitting straight in front of me, but Christylee had an excellent view, and that's what the whole trip was about, so I'm glad for her. And no, that photo isn't of Marsters, it's from Saturday night's costume contest.

Christylee got to hear Spike quote Shakespeare and sing acapella, and really, how many of us can say that?

There's more, which will have to wait for Christylee's return, but she's already looking forward to next year, and trying to wrestly with who she'll "go as." I'm thinking she'll make an excellent Black Cat.

...What it is ain't exactly clear.

Okay, so everyone knows that Christylee and I met courtesy of a mutual fascination with Lizzie McGuire. And I think most people have followed that I've turned her on to Buffy, followed by Angel, and then Smallville. She's introduced me to Gilmore Girls and Monk, and we've discovered Firefly, 24, Heroes, Veronica Mars and Lost...together. We've either finished, or are in the process of watching all these series on DVD, with the exception of Heroes, of course. Every night, we watch an episode of one show, during dinner, rotating our series. Currently, we're rotating between the fifth season of Smallville, the first season of Gilmore Girls, and the lone season of Firefly.

I told you that to tell you this.

We've noticed something pretty...creepy...going on with the shows we've watched. All these shows are connected--somehow--to each other, in some grand spider-web. The same cast and crew keep showing up, in these ten series. It's one thing when you see Firefly actors repackaged to appear in Buffy and Angel, after Firefly's pre-mature demise, since all three shows are exec produced by Joss Whedon.

But when 24 is tied to Monk, or Lost is tied to Gilmore Girls, well, that's just...odd. And even Lizzie McGuire.

Everyone knows that Lalaine appears in Buffy, right? I'm not spoiling you, am I? But did you realize that Howard Gordon is a name shared by the producer for Buffy and Angel (and also 24, thankyouverymuch) and Gordo's father? Do you know the name of Buffy's stuffed pig? Gordo. Even an actor with a bit part in Lizzie as a director, turns out to be the Big Bad in the first season of Heroes.

Sometimes it seems that every episode of every show we watch, has someone in it from some other show we watch. Even Joss Whedon appears as an actor in both Angel and Veronica Mars.

What are the odds that we would pick 10 shows to watch, that use so many of the same performers, over and over?

Here's a list for your edification, and I promise you, it's by no means exhaustive. I've also included some of the movies by the Lizzie McGuire principals. And for the record, actors who play the same role in both Buffy and Angel, or the Lizzie show and movie, don't count.

Alyson Hannigan: Buffy/Veronica Mars
James Marsters: Buffy/Smallville
Emma Caulfield: Buffy/Monk
Charisma Carpenter: Buffy/Veronica Mars
Danny Strong: Buffy/Gilmore Girls
Charlie Weber: Buffy/Veronica Mars
Harry Groener: Buffy/Monk
D.B. Woodside: Buffy/24
Leonard Roberts: Buffy/Smallville/Heroes/24
Nathan Fillion: Buffy/Firefly/Lost
Lalaine: Lizzie McGuire/Buffy/Royal Kill
Joss Whedon: Angel/Veronica Mars/Firefly
Daniel Dae Kim: Angel/24/Lost
Keith Szarabajka: Angel/24
Sam Anderson: Angel/Lost
Jonathan M. Woodward: Angel/Firefly
John Rubinstein: Angel/24
Gina Torres: Angel/Firefly/24
Adam Baldwin: Angel/Firefly
Brigid Branagh: Angel/24
David Herman: Angel/24
Summer Glau: Firefly/Angel
Jeff Rickets: Buffy/Angel/Firefly/24
Enrico Colantoni: Veronica Mars/Monk
Teddy Dunn: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Kyle Gallner: Veronica Mars/Smallville
Lisa Thornhill: Veronica Mars/Monk
Max Greenfield: Veronica Mars/When Do We Eat/Gilmore Girls
Ken Marino: Veronica Mars/Monk/Angel
Christopher B. Duncan: Veronica Mars/24
Krysten Ritter: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Rodney Rowland: Veronica Mars/Angel
Rick Peters: Veronica Mars/Heroes/Smallville
Aaron Ashmore: Veronica Mars/Smallville
Adam Hendershott: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Adam Bitterman: Veronica Mars/Buffy
Christian Clemenson: Veronica Mars/Buffy
Lisa Long: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Kane Ritchotte: Monk/When Do We Eat
Melora Hardin: Monk/Gilmore Girls
Jarrad Paul: Monk/Buffy
Sean Gunn: Gilmore Girls/Angel
Jared Padalecki: Gilmore Girls/Smallville/Cheaper By The Dozen
Matt Czuchry: Gilmore Girls/Veronica Mars
Milo Ventimiglia: Gilmore Girls/Heroes
Rose Abdoo: Gilmore Girls/Monk
Ted Rooney: Gilmore Girls/Cheaper By The Dozen
Alan Loayza: Gilmore Girls/Buffy
Michael Deluise: Gilmore Girls/Lost
Ethan Cohn: Gilmore Girls/Heroes
Chad Michael Murray: Gilmore Girls/Cinderella Story
Gregg Henry: Gilmore Girls/24/Firefly
Adam Brody: Gilmore Girls/Smallville
Alex Borstein: Gilmore Girls/Lizzie McGuire movie
Jim Jansen: Gilmore Girls/Veronica Mars/Monk
Adam Wylie: Gilmore Girls/Monk/Veronica Mars
Brian Tarantina: Gilmore Girls/Heroes
Riki Lindhome: Gilmore Girls/Buffy/Heroes
Tom Welling: Smallville/Cheaper By The Dozen/Cheaper By The Dozen 2
Emmannuelle Vaugier: Smallville/Monk/Veronica Mars
Ian Somerhalder: Smallville/Lost
Mary Lynn Rajskub: 24/Gilmore Girls/Firewall
Glenn Morshower: 24/Monk/Buffy
Gregory Itzin: 24/Firefly
Eric Balfour: 24/Buffy
Zachary Quinto: Heroes/24/Lizzie McGuire
Daniel Bess: 24/Veronica Mars/Firefly
Geoffrey Pierson: 24/Veronica Mars/Monk
Adoni Maropis: 24/Angel
Zeljko Ivanek: 24/Lost
Lana Parrilla: 24/Lost
John Terry: 24/Lost
Rena Sofer: 24/Heroes
Nick Jameson: 24/Lost
Richard Burgi: 24/Firefly
Peter Weller: 24/Lost
Paul Blackthorne: 24/Monk
Sean Astin: 24/Monk
Stephen Spinella: 24/Heroes
Regina King: 24/Cinderella Story
Harris Yulin: Buffy/24
Skye McCole Bartusiak: 24/Lost
Alan Dale: 24/Lost
Billy Burke: 24/Monk/Gilmore Girls
Misha Collins: 24/Monk
Matthew Carey: 24/Veronica Mars
Donnie Keshawarz: 24/Lost
Jackui Maxwell: 24/Gilmore Girls
Megalyn Echikunwoke: 24/Veronica Mars/Buffy
Navi Rawat: 24/Angel
Mark Sheppard: 24/Monk/Firefly
Jamie McShane: 24/Monk/Firefly/Angel
Rudolf Martin: 24/Buffy
Silas Weir Mitchell: 24/Monk
Tony Plana: 24/Monk
John Eddins: 24/Angel
Josh Cruze: 24/Monk
Anthony Azizi: 24/Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Masi Oka: Heroes/Gilmore Girls
Greg Grunberg: Heroes/Monk/Lost
Christine Rose: Heroes/Gilmore Girls
Nora Zehetner: Heroes/Gilmore Girls
Clea DuVall: Heroes/Buffy
Missy Peregryn: Heroes/Smallville
Eric Roberts: Heroes/Royal Kill
Colby French: Heroes/24/Angel
Josh Clark: Heroes/24
Shishir Kurup: Lost/Heroes/Monk
Malcolm McDowell: Heroes/Monk
Stana Katic: Heroes/24
Nicole Bilderback: Heroes/Buffy
Link Baker: Heroes/Smallville
Karl T. Wright: Heroes/Monk/Gilmore Girls
Josh Holloway: Lost/Angel
EvAngeline Lilly: Lost/Smallville
Henry Ian Cusick: Lost/24
Fredric Lehne: Lost/Firefly
Nestor Carbonell: Lost/Monk
Francois Chau: Lost/24
Daniel Roebuck: Lost/Monk
Adetokumboh M'Cormack: Lost/Gilmore Girls
Brett Cullen: Lost/Monk
Tony Lee: Lost/Monk/24
Brian Goodman: Lost/24
Lindsey Ginter: Lost/Angel
Gabrielle Fitzpatrick: Lost/Angel
Tracy Middendorf: Lost/24/Angel
Michael Vendrell: Lost/Angel
Felicia Day: Buffy/Monk
Adam Kaufman: Buffy/Veronica Mars
Saverio Guerra: Buffy/Monk
Jeff Kober: Buffy/24
Andy Umberger: Buffy/24/Firefly/Angel
Randy Thompson: Buffy/24
Heath Castor: Buffy/Angel
Conor O'Farrell: Buffy/24
James MacDonald: Buffy/24
Bob Morrisey: Buffy/24/Gilmore Girls/Angel
Carl J. Johnson: Buffy/Monk
James M. Connor: Buffy/Gilmore Girls
Steven W. Bailey: Buffy/Angel
Dania Ramirez: Buffy/Heroes
Max Perlich: Gilmore Girls/Buffy
Franc Ross: Buffy/Monk/Firefly
Azura Skyle: Buffy/Smallville
Rob Benedict: Buffy/Monk
Nick Chinlund: Buffy/Gilmore Girls
Cynthia Lamontagne: Buffy/Veronica Mars
Chet Grissom: Buffy/Monk/Veonica Mars
Oliver Muirhead: Buffy/Gilmore Girls/Lost
Kris Iyer: Buffy/24
Brian Reddy: Buffy/Gilmore Girls
Persia White: Buffy/Angel
Angie Hart: Buffy/Firefly
Scott L. Schwartz: Buffy/Angel
Bonita Friedericy: Buffy/Monk/Angel/Veronica Mars
Bob Fimiani: Buffy/Angel/Firefly
Paul Hayes: Buffy/Monk
Alan Henry Brown: Buffy/Angel
David Fury: Angel/Buffy
Mike Grief: Buffy/Monk
David Meunier: Buffy/Monk/Angel
Stacey Scowley: Buffy/Monk
Sven Holmbert: Angel/Monk/Gilmore Girls
T.J. Thyne: Angel/24/Raise Your Voice
Mark Colson: Angel/Gilmore Girls
Leland Crooke: Angel/Buffy
Marc Vann: Angel/Monk
Justin Shilton: Angel/Buffy
Mark Ginther: Angel/Buffy
Michael Mantell: Angel/Gilmore Girls/24/Lizzie McGuire
Jim Abele: Angel/24
Derek Anthony: Angel/Buffy
Jason Padgett: Angel/24
Brett Wagner: Angel/Buffy
Joshua Grenrock: Angel/Firefly
Lyla Kanouse: Angel/Gilmore Girls/Firefly/Lizzie McGuire
Kevin Fry: Angel/Monk/24
Darris Love: Angel/Buffy
Danan Pere: Angel/Lost
David Figlioli: Angel/Monk
Patrick Fabian: Veronica Mars/24
Carl Bresk: Veronica Mars/Firefly
Matt McKenzie: Veronica Mars/24
David Starzyk: Veronica Mars/Lost
Michael B. Silver: Veronica Mars/Monk
Steve Rankin: Veronica Mars/24/Buffy
Roy Werner: Veronica Mars/Angel/Firefly
Jonathan Bennett: Veronica Mars/Smallville/Cheaper by the Dozen 2
Leighton Meester: Veronica Mars/24
Jonathan Chase: Veronica Mars/Monk
Zachery Ty Bryan: Veronica Mars/Smallville/Buffy
Jeremy Roy Valdez: Veronica Mars/24
Anastasia Baranova: Veronica Mars/Lizzie McGuire
Dana Davis: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls/Raise Your Voice
John Prosky: Veronica Mars/Heroes/24
Benito Paje: Veronica Mars/24
Paul Ganus: Veronica Mars/Heroes
Jeremy Roberts: Veronica Mars/Monk/Buffy
Gil Birmingham: Veronica Mars/Buffy
Lucas Grabeel: Veronica Mars/Smallville
Meredith Roberts: Veronica Mars/Monk
Samantha Klein: Veronica Mars/Gilmore Girls
Mel Fair: Veronica Mars/Monk/Buffy
Rob LaBelle: Smallville/Monk
Jonathan Taylor Thomas: Smallville/Veronica Mars
Dan Joffre: Smallville/Lizzie McGuire Movie
Dean McKenzie: Smallville/Monk
Brenda Crichlow: Smallville/Firewall
Justin Chatwin: Smallville/Lost
Davida Williams: Lizzie McGuire/Raise Your Voice
Troy Rowland: Lizzie McGuire/Material Girls
Tonya Rowland: Lizzie McGuire/Material Girls
Brad Grunberg: Lizzie McGuire/24
Phill Lewis: Lizzie McGuire/Buffy
Madeline Zima: Cinderella Story/Gilmore Girls
Kevin Kilner: Cinderella Story/Monk
J.D. Pardo: Cinderella Story/Veronica Mars
Art LeFleur: Cinderella Story/Angel
John Billingsley: Cinderella Story/Angel/Gilmore Girls
Carlie Westerman: Cinderella Story/Veronica Mars
Taylor Hoover: Cinderella Story/Lizzie McGuire/Lizzie McGuire movie
Sandra McCoy: Cinderella Story/Veronica Mars
John H. Tobin: Cinderella Story/Gilmore Girls
Lukas Haas: 24/Material Girls
Dot Jones: Lizzie McGuire/Material Girls
Faith Prince: Material Girls/Monk
Cheryl Hawker: Material Girls/Monk
Timothy Davis Reed: Material Girls/Monk/24
Annie McKnight: Material Girls/Heroes
Kayla Ewell: Material Girls/Veronica Mars
Carly Schroeder: Lizzie McGuire/Firewall
Jimmy Bennett: Firewall/Gilmore Girls
David Lewis: Firewall/Smallville
Eric Keenleyside: Firewall/Smallville
Ona Grauer: Firewall/Smallville/Lizzie McGuire Movie
Kett Turton: Firewall/24/Smallville
Vincent Gale: Firewall/Monk
Beverley Breuer: Firewall/Smallville
Jennifer Kitchen: Firewall/Smallville
Elizabeth Thai: Firewall/Smallville
Michael Cavanaugh: Monk/24
Adam Lamberg: Lizzie McGuire/When Do We Eat
Meredith Scott Lynn: When Do We Eat/Monk
Mark Ivanir: When Do We Eat/Monk/24
Oscar Nunez: When Do We Eat/24
Victoria Justice: When Do We Eat/Gilmore Girls

By my count, that's about 250 duplicates, before we stopped counting. There's no more than two degrees of separation for any of the ten shows we watch. And that's a clue.

Christylee's birthday is coming up in September, and to celebrate, I'll be taking her to Dragon*Con in Atlanta, where she'll get to hug (or at least, be in the same building with) James Marsters, known to some as Spike.

Once Mary, Christylee's former roommate, hears about this, she will be insanely jealous, and I expect she'll start making her plans to join us.

So is Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus the next Britn-- uh, Hilary?

Hilary won the role of Lizzie McGuire as part of the Duff family's grand scheme to follow the Britney model to mega-stardom: First you star on a Disney Channel show, then you make your first CD, filled with bubble gum. After a couple of CD's, and concert tours packed with screaming, adoring, money-spending tween-age girls, you announce that you're "not a little girl, any more" and introduce your more mature sound. Which means that finally, adult males can breathe a little easier.

This, of course, has an unforeseen effect on the starlet who preceded you in the chain (in Hilary's case, Britney), but that's a post for another day.

Now, it appears Miley Cyrus is riding that wave to Starlet Heaven: The star of her very own Disney show, where she gets to sing all sorts of...well, no, it's really only one sort, I suppose...of bubble gum pop.

Is Hilary looking over her shoulder yet?

P.S. And, yes, if her name sounds the slightest bit familiar, fear no more. That's no LSD flashback you're experiencing. Her father is, indeed, Billy Ray. See? She's got superstar pedigree.

Watch out for some exciting new projects coming in the next couple of months for Lizzie McGuire fanfiction, thanks mostly to Christyleereno. I'm not just talking about new stories. I'm talking about new kinds of stories.

Your world will be rocked. You heard it here first. You're welcome.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog.

Raise your hand if you remember the show Twin Peaks.

Twin Peaks was a...well, no other word but weird fits here...series from David Lynch about bizarre happenings in a town in the Great Northwest. Every episode had some big twist in it, and ended with some unexplainable occurence.

We had backward-talking dwarves, and clairvoyant waitresses, and smoke-filled corridors that led nowhere. It gathered a lot of attention with the first half-dozen episodes. Audiences were glued to their tv sets every week, wondering, "Just what is this story about?"

The problem was, after two years, they never got around to explaining what the story was about. They'd introduce subplots, and then contradict them in the next episode, or otherwise, forget them altogether.

After a while, you got the definite impression that the creators didn't know what the story was about, or where they were going. They were just writing stuff and throwing it against the wall, wondering, "How can we confuse the viewers this week?" In essence, they were laughing at the audience.

I can't help but think there was some of this in X-Files, too. I got disgusted with the X-Files, showing us peaks into the Grand Conspiracy (TM) one week, only to pull the rug out from under us the next week. (Oh, you actually believed that stuff last week? Well, that was all a lie!)

Christylee and I have recently wrapped the first season of Lost on DVD, and I've got some lingering concerns about this series, too. What's this show about? How many mysteries can this island hold? Do they have plans to actually answer all the questions they're bringing up here?

Or are the creators laughing up their metaphorical sleeves at the audience?

I'm withholding judgement on these questions, for the time being, because the show has got me hooked enough to try out the second season. But they're walking a dangerous tightrope with me.

Since I was the one who provided that rather sickly-looking scary photo of Hilary Duff to christyleereno it's only fitting that I be the one to announce that maybe the tween queen is pulling back from the precipice.

These shots are from the new issue of Shape, due to hit the stands any minute now, and Hilary has one. A shape, that is. Of course, most eyes are drawn directly to the cleavage, but what I'm looking at (in comparison to the photo on christylee's site) are her arms, her cheeks, her abdomen. And she's looking much healthier now.

Well...okay, I'm looking at the cleavage, too, but that's not all I'm lookin' at, okay?

Welcome back, Hilary.

Tonight, students, we delve into the dark world of mature fan fiction, and not just any old mature fan fiction, but mature fan fiction based on a show originally marketed toward 10-year-olds.

Yes, I'm talking about Lizzie McGuire. And, no, I didn't say "adult" fan fiction, and intentionally so. Adult fan fiction is a reeeeealllly dark world, usually populated by denizens of the underground who haven't seen the outside world (outside of their own bedcovers, that is) since being rejected by their eighth-grade crush in front of her locker after lunch period.

Not that that ever happened to me.

"Mature" fanfic can be found on some of the more respectable sites, the largest being fanfiction.net. And our subject tonight can be found there, in a tight little ditty by Glass Mermaid, titled "Love and Lip Gloss."

Go and read it now. It's only three or four screens. You can force yourself. I'll wait.

Now, let's see... where did I put that crockpot?

Ah, you're back. Now the beauty of this story is that you don't have to know the characters. You needn't (is that a word? I'll get a letter from the Grammar Nazi, if it's not) have ever watched a single episode (with your nieces, of course). All you need to know is that Lizzie and Gordo are teenagers, experiencing the horizontal macarena for the first time.

Now what makes this a sterling example of storytelling?

Well, it's not the plot. Guy makes love to gal, or vice versa. Nothing particularly innovative there.

It's not really the characterization. In a one-page snippet like this, you don't really have the time to explore the motivations. I think the reader can fill in the blanks, on the motivation scale.

Theme? Hmmmm.... I think the theme is that sex is pleasurable. What do you think?

No, no, no, nono. It's all about the style, guys.

Our writer here (and pardon me for my chauvanism, but I'm going to assume the writer is female) has eschewed the old bump and grind, and treated us to an exploration of all the sensations that crop up during sex, without concentrating on the sex. And boys and girls, that ain't easy.

She's targeted each of the five senses, sharing with the reader not just what Lizzie and Gordo see, and what they feel (in the tactile sense), but the sounds, the smells, the tastes of lovemaking.

She's taken a sex scene, and turned it into a love scene.

Bravo. (Sound of a slow clap)

Spoilers ahoy for: 24 Season 1

Christy Lee and I have recently finished a marathon session of the first season of 24.

Before I go any further, let me stress that I don't want to see any spoilers for season 2 onwards in any comments.

For the unitiated, 24 takes place in real time, which is to say, the events in the story occur in the same amount of time it takes to show you what's happening. There are no segues that skip ahead to the next morning. Commercial breaks last three minutes and forty-seven seconds, and that's exactly how much time passes for Jack Bauer and company, on the show. The first season consists of 24 episodes, one for each hour of a 24-hour day. The season begins and ends at midnight.

I first saw this technique, in an episode of M*A*S*H, the 70's sitcom set during the Korean War.

24 is a much better use of the technique, although, of course, it has its problems.

Most of the problems lie with the suspension of disbelief.

It's one of the great cliches that, in Hollywood, there's always an open parking spot, directly in front of where the character wants to go. Except, when you're telling a story in real time, that's not good enough.

In this mythos, your characters can take no longer than twenty minutes to get from one location to the next, even if travelling across the greater metropolitan area. Now I don't claim to be an authority on Los Angeles, but I have visited, and if there's one thing I know about L.A., it's that you don't go anywhere quickly. Hell, it takes twenty minutes, just to cross the street to buy a newspaper.

There are three stages of traffic in L.A.: Heavy, Really Heavy, and Gridlock. There's no point of the 24-hour day where traffic can be thought of as "light," which is what I'm seeing pretty consistently on 24.

Does this bother me? Does it interrupt my suspension of disbelief? No. I'll cut them some slack. The truth is, we don't want to see Jack Bauer, tapping his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel, waiting for Ma and Pa Kettle to get out of his way. Sometimes it's necessary to sacrifice reality, in order to better tell the story.

If they had paid a greater attention to this kind of detail, 24 would be more believable. It would also be very dull.

But...here's something else.

Have you ever stayed up for 24 hours?

Yes?

How about 42 hours? Cause that's a lot closer to what Jack Bauer has actually done here. He's presumably about to settle in for the night, at midnight, when he receives a call from the office, telling him to hustle his ass down to CTU, for an emergency meeting. By the time the story starts, he's already been awake for approximately eighteen hours.

Now, we only see him eat once, and apparently no one in this story needs a bathroom break (which, again, I don't want to see), but after being awake for 30 hours or so (and remember, he's not the only one), we should see Bauer, his wife and daughter, and the Senator's family all--literally--walking into walls.

Does this bother me? Does it interrupt my suspension of disbelief? Well, yes and no. I don't believe it, but, oddly enough, it doesn't bother me. Why not? Maybe it's because the story isn't intended as a comedy.

But...here's something else.

We find out in approximately Hour 23 that the mole in CTU is Jack's trusted confidante, Nina.

During the first 20 hours or so, we're led to believe that someone is a traitor, and at one point or another, the wary viewer suspects everyone. But eventually, we see enough of Nina, alone...you know: "by herself", to allay our suspicions. And then, the big revelation seems to come out of the blue.

Does this bother me? Does it interrupt my suspension of disbelief? You betcha.

Christy Lee and I had started rewatching all of season 1, with this new information in hindsight, to see if everything fit, or did the creators cheat? Unfortunately, her time expired, and she had to return her copy to the library, so we were interrupted after about 6 hours or so. I'm determined not to go on without her, so our research will have to wait until her big move next month.

My point though, is that there were times when Nina didn't act as if she were anything other than honest, even when there was no reason for her to. For instance, after Jack's wife and daughter were taken to the clinic, Nina shows up at the clinic to make sure they're safe. She runs into one of the assassins sent by the brothers, who's pretending to be an FBI agent. When she finds other FBI agents, who claim to be the only agents at the clinic, she immediately knows something is wrong, and head back to stop the assassin.

Uh...why?

So I'm catching up on my reading of Captain Savage and His Leatherneck Raiders (it helps when your uncle owns a massive Marvel Comics collection), and I realize that, by 1970, the Marvel style had finally caught up even with the war comics.

Captain Savage, for those of you who don't know, was a knock-off of Marvel's own Sgt. Fury and His Howling Commandos (crickets chirping). sigh. Okay. Sgt. Fury was Marvel's attempt to capitalize on DC's success with war comics. And it was quite successful, in its own way, lasting for a total of 167 issues, which took it all through the 60's, and well into the 70's.

In an effort to expand its market share, Marvel introduced the Captain Savage book circa 1968, but it never really got off the ground, and lasted only 19 issues, before fading into obscurity. Well, that's being generous. It faded into obscurity long before its nineteenth issue.

Anyway, by the penultimate issue, the writing was probably on the wall at the Marvel offices, vis a vis the Raiders' future, and so the creators apparently attempted a last-ditch effort to boost its readership by introducing one of the elements that had made Marvel's superhero line so popular in the 60's: the soap opera element.

Their answer was to belatedly introduce us to Captain Savage's wife and children, in the form of a Dear John letter. She's grown tired of waiting for him to return from duty, and is asking for a divorce. Who would have thought it? Romance and heartbreak in a war comic? Only Marvel...

Was it successful? Well, no. The book was cancelled with the next issue, and although a change in direction was promised at the end of issue 19, fans of the Leathernecks are still waiting for that change, 35 years later. But that's hardly the point.

While it would be tempting to deride Marvel's efforts as doomed to failure, since the book was written for a much younger audience than Marvel's college-aged super hero fans (and it clearly was; the plot developments were astonishingly simplistic and unbelievable, even by Silver Age standards), they weren't really meeting that intended audience. In fact, a quick glance at any letters page revealed that anywhere from 25 to 50 percent of their readership was actually coming from the military.

Instead of deriding Marvel, they should be hailed for addressing the concern that every G.I. in Vietnam must have had, in 1970. The Dear John letter. Only Marvel...